sunday drive

remember the "sunday drive"? sometimes it was straight to and from church, arriving to a home filled with the sent of roast, or sometimes it was a long drive to get to church, which allowed time to cloud gaze out of the window. Sometimes that drive took us around a bend for some yummy lunch or a candy treat, and sometimes it was a detour (shortcuts my dad liked to call them) that lasted a little longer than expected. always, though, there was something about them that made my sunday seem a little better and there existed a closeness with the people i was with (maybe for you jess, britt, and cory a little too close!). i have to say that i had forgotten the peace that a nice drive can bring especially in the fall. kyle and i were showing our house last sunday, and after running errands and fighting crowds at sam's club, he took us down this little road just outside of farmington. he wanted to look at a possible land site to buy and build a home on. as i rolled down the window to take a better look, the scent of fall filled the truck. do you know what scent i am speaking of? it smells cool and crisp with a mixture of bark, leaves, and grass all melted together. it took me back to my childhood and playing out in the yard at dusk during the fall. it was such a beautiful area and such a peaceful, happy experience....just thought i would share it with you!

this is one of the plots that is for sale. on the other side of the trees is a view of the river.

i am not sure if you can see her, but there is a deer standing in the center of this picture. she was there with her baby and another deer. they were standing by the river taking in the same sight we were! and what a sight it was!!

kyle took this picture as we were parked by the river watching the deer. the river was flowing quite quickly, which filled the air with watery music and babbling.

there were three horses in a field on the way back up the road.they were calm and absolutley graceful. kyle has always been a horse lover, but i am now convinced that we MUST live somewhere where there is enough room for a horse to graze.
we both left with the crisp air filling our lungs and brains with desires of this home sweet home.

just being

in all of the rush to figure out what we want to be when we grow up, how to get ahead, what it means to be successful, do you think we forget about who we are in the moment? as children, we are frequently asked "what do you want to be when you grow up?" in high school we might be asked, "what college do you want to go to?" in college the question of choice is "what is your major?" and after college or into adulthood we are asked "what do you do?" all of these questions are set out to make us think of the future and make goals for ourselves, or to recieve some type of status along the corporate ladder...which can be good. however, they also take us away from the present. they all focus on what else is out there for us....encourage us to push harder and show more. we are supposed to have an answer to all of those questions, and boy oh boy, i used to have those answers! but now, i don't. and it is uncomfortable for me. i know it is important to have goals, but in order to understand what is out there for me, i think i need to rediscover what this woman is all about just by simply BEING. being in this moment and living this life as fully as i can right now, that is my goal. i want to take the positives that exist in my life and celebrate them. right now is my life...right now i am many things that don't have a title and paycheck attached. i am many things that are verbs, adjectives, and nouns. no matter what my answers are to those questions, i AM...and that is worth writing about!

my hope in sharing this is two fold. one, to rediscover what makes up all of me and two, that you join me! take some time to focus on who or what you ARE...and share it in the comments (if you visit) or on your blog (for you bloggers) once a week, once a month, or once in a while so that we all may know a little more about you and the gorgeous, incredible, amazing person that you ARE....simply by "just being."

a boquet of thanks

just some home grown boquets of thanks to everyone for stopping long enough to make a comment on my new blog. not only did your comments encourage me to embrace all of this necessary change in my life, it also helped to ease some self doubt about sharing my life in a new way. your comments were amazing to read. when people start to share their personal stories, it encourages and reminds us that we are not alone. i am inspired by how much we all have in common...that all of us seek something in life that helps us to become something beyond what we were yesterday and hopeful for what we will be tomorrow. thanks for sharing a piece of yourself here.

falling into change

life is interesting isn't it?

everything about it suggests change, shift, cycles, and growth. and yet there are some people like me who try so hard to resist joining nature in her natural swing of "things". why is that? i am trying to shift that resistance into something much more positive...something that embraces rather than pushes the challenges that life has to offer a person. i would describe myself as someone who enjoys predictability....schedules...control of my environment. but, is that really all that i have to say abou who i am? are those all of the words that wrap around THIS person...THIS soul??? i would say no. currently, there are MANY questions that fill my mind. today, the most prevelent one is WHO AM I??? what a strange question for a 31 (well almost) year old woman to ask herself. i have recently strayed from my chosen (at the age of 7) career as a teacher. All of my life i have worked VERY hard to acheive this dream of teaching. i was a very good student in the past, graduating high school and college with honors. i have been someone who sets goals, achieves them, and continues on the path. the path that i PLANNED. and now i find myself in a situation where the plans are not as easy to come by. i recently moved, took some time off of teaching, and am discovering that without that label of "teacher" do i really know who i am? this is what i am finding out....

a human being is comprised of so many different personalities and dreams. did i always dream of being j-lo's back up dancer??? yes. did i ever share that and work toward it? no. because i am a practical person. but that is not all. we have too many compartments and corners to be just ONE thing. we are not just friend, sister, lover, or woman: career oriented, focused, or talented. we are the combination of ALL of them. we are all self conscious, proud, weary, and strong. we are pleasant, angry, spiteful and kind. and we are those things at different times of the ever changing cycle of life. sometimes we let parts of us lay silent for too long though. without "teacher" who am i? i am finding it out. i am "turning a new leaf" and embracing the changes that are to come, joining nature in her beauty and acceptance.